The Dreaded 'C' Word: Colonoscopy.

I have wondered about pre-mature screening for years: not only did Daddy die from colon cancer, but both of my grandmothers & one of my grandfathers were diagnosed with gastrointestinal cancers. I've discussed early detection with my doctor on numerous occasions but have been so convicted lately that while it is one thing to discuss it, its another thing to be active for your own health. You are your own advocate.

So today, I met with a colon surgeon & scheduled a colonoscopy for the end of the month. Based on my family history & some "symptoms" he agreed that I was the perfect candidate for early screening.

Knowing the havoc it can wreak on a person & their loved ones, I want to be as active as I possibly can to, hopefully, ensure that myself & my family does not have to suffer from this deadly disease. Having Prater Ellis, I cannot imagine her having to care for me with I were to be diagnosed or, as a worse case scenario, leaving her too soon.

Speaking of my little nugget, she charmed every one at the surgery center & I was offered money for her more than once... oh, she delights me. After our appointment, we met her Daddy for lunch at the Christian Chicken & she was SO happy to see him, not that you could tell from her gigantic smile...

Then we did a ton of 'running around': I was in desperate need of a brow wax, the Benz was in desperate need of an oil change, I had a tub of clothes that I dropped off at two separate consignment stores... it was a productive afternoon, I love getting to mark things off of my to do list. 

When I came home, my lovely lady friend, Amber, had left this goodness on my porch - seriously, how am I so lucky to have such amazing girl friends? In what world do I deserve them? I don't know, but I hope they all know how ridiculously blessed they make me feel & oh, how they enrich my life, especially in this season!

Paula Deen's Gooey Butter Cake

I am looking forward to this yumminess that is smelling up my house, cooking in the slow cooker.

I am looking forward to not having any plans for the rest of the week/weekend, other than possibly introducing my husband to the goodness that is Marcy Jo's at some point this coming weekend & visiting another new church.

And, I am looking forward to continuing a little Valentine's Day project that I started for my hubby today - I will definitely be sharing more later, along with some other silly little things I am doing for my two sweethearts.

Happy Hump Day y'all! Prater Ellis rolled from her back to her belly for the first time this morning, we are going to spend the rest of the afternoon practicing that new trick!

Menu Plan.

Prater Ellis & I have had a fun ((but SUPER busy)) week while the mister has been away on business... we are both oh-so ready for him to be home. I have felt "off" all week & I know it's because my bud isn't around & that really throws my bubble out-of-whack. Anywho, while he's busy taking a million flights back to us tomorrow, my little & I will be doing laundry, grocery shopping, getting the Benz's oil changed, picking up the house... all the things I have neglected to do this week opting to "play" instead. Here's the menu that I will be shopping for tomorrow.

Friday, the 27th, Supper: Poppy Seed Chicken with Green Beans & Sister Shubert Rolls

Saturday, the 28th, Lunch: Lightened Up Baked Crab Ragoon

Sunday, the 29th, Breakfast: Toast with Jelly, Bacon, & Scrambled Eggs

Sunday, the 29th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Sunday, the 29th, Supper: Marlboro Man’s Favorite Sandwich with Chips

Tuesday, the 31st, Supper: Slow Cooker Chicken Taco Bowls

Wednesday, the 1st, Supper: Slow Cooker Bacon Ranch Chicken Pasta & Sister Shubert Rolls

Thursday, the 2nd, Supper: Slow Cooker Cheesy Chicken Spaghetti with Garlic Knots

Friday, the 3rd, Supper: Penne Gorgonzola with Chicken & Garlic Knots
Saturday, the 4th, Breakfast: Pancakes
Saturday, the 4th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips
Saturday, the 4th, Supper: Taco Stuffed Pasta Shells with Mexican Rice
Sunday, the 5th, Breakfast: Cereal
Sunday, the 5th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips
Sunday, the 5th, Supper: Crispy Baked Chicken with Micro-Mashed Potatoes & Sister Shubert Rolls

Monday, the 6th, Supper: Chicken Parmesan Bake with Garlic Knots
Tuesday, the 7th, Lunch: Mexican Chicken Ring with Mexican Rice
Tuesday, the 7th, Supper: Slow Cooker Picante Chicken with Brown Rice & Sister Shubert Rolls
Wednesday, the 8th, Supper: Slow Cooker Taco Pasta

Thursday, the 9th, Supper: Chicken Nachos with Mexican Rice

Most of these recipes are new-to-me via Pinterest... I am looking forward to trying them & the hubby sure has enjoyed all of the new meals we have been trying as well as having yummy leftovers for work the following day. It is so easy for Pinterest to overwhelm me but I've taken some of The Mom Creative's advice & made my boards very specific & also created a "Completed Pins" board to move pins to once I have tried/completed them. I also try to only pin things that I really think I may use/cook/buy/etc. Otherwise, I get overwhelmed & it's no longer fun for me.

Hope all of y'all have a great weekend! I am looking forward to taking my honey to a new favorite restaurant, Marcy Jo's, visiting a new church, & spending time with family & friends! Happy almost Friday!

Where Life & Death Collide.

Every time I open the door to Prater Ellis' nursery, I have a tiny millisecond flashback to the morning that I found Daddy - most likely moments after suffering a heart attack as a result of his organs shutting down in the night. A movie scene plays quickly in my head: I open the door & glance at the wall where his headboard was positioned - I notice his body is stiff & yellow, his eyes as wide as they could possibly get, & his body cold to the touch. Every single time I open the door - my heart skips a beat & I have to catch my breath.

It is such a ridiculously bitter-sweet moment. I wish, oh gosh how I wish, that my sister, Aaron, & I didn't have this memory: Chels crawled in to bed with him & we're standing beside him, squalling & screaming promises that we'll take care of each other, for him to not worry about us, & that we love him all while waiting on the ambulance to arrive to guarantee that he isn't in any pain as his precious life comes to an end.

But here's the "sweet".

Because of that moment, I count my blessings more than I count my misfortunes during the day, every day; I know all too well that life really can change in an instant.

Because of that moment, I hold Prater a little tighter when she cries for me; forever thankful that He makes "beauty for ashes" & that her lungs are healthy enough to scream when they want or need to.

Because of that moment, I don't worry about my sister nearly as much as I sometimes feel like I should; I was frozen in the front yard, afraid that I would be alone in the ambulance if he were to die on the way to the hospital - only one person could ride along & without hesitation, she jumped in - she's probably the strongest woman I know.

Because of that moment, I know without a shadow of a doubt, that I do not ever want to experience anything in this life without Aaron; he stood behind me, with his hand on my shoulder while I buried my head into Daddy's freckled arm, for hours, waiting & praying for the nightmare to end... & when it did, he leaned over & whispered in my ear that it was over, so over.

Just some things that have been weighing heavily on my heart for the past few weeks... Sometimes I feel like, for weeks, I need to write before I eventually do... It takes a lot out of me, I usually wind up squalling at my keyboard & exhausted, but I ALWAYS feel better after. Relieved even, as if I've been carrying the words around as a burden for weeks & getting to 'unload' here gives me renewed strength.

Renewed strength to know that even though I struggle daily with the balance of being happy with my new life while mourning my old life that he would tickle me silly (his preferred way of torture) for not enjoying every single moment of this new life...

I just miss him. It's been a year & 2 months now & I just miss him. I know some people probably grow tired of me talking about the whole ordeal or him or how much I miss him... But I guess another lesson I have learned in all of this is that, as a society, we are so bombarded with tragedies that we've become desensitized to those who continue to grieve their losses long after the hoopla of the visitation & the funeral. I want to challenge myself to be more sensitive to individuals' grieving processes, no matter the amount of time or relationship.

Every other day, while flipping through the mail as I walk back to the house from the mailbox, I come across his name & feel like the wind has been knocked out of me. I hear sad news about old family friends & the first thing I think of is "Don't forget to tell Daddy about that." Momma asks Prater Ellis if she's heard from her Daddy & I automatically think, "I haven't talked to Daddy today, I need to call him real quick." I hear Aaron opening & closing his chest-of-drawers (we are using Daddy's old bedroom suite now), flash back to living at home & think "Daddy's up, maybe he'll fix me some breakfast."

I'm not sure when it will all end, if ever. On one hand, I would like to open Prater Ellis' nursery door without thinking of his death... But then again, there cannot be death without life & if that helps me to hold his life & hers so precious & dear & memorable, so be it.

Mommy DIY.

I have really enjoyed stepping out of my comfort zone & trying new things as Prater Ellis' mommy. If the Me of 3 years ago met the Me of today, she definitely wouldn't even recognize herself. During my pregnancy, I made some decisions to try a few things different from my norm & if they worked out, great, but if they didn't I would just be proud of myself for trying... thankfully, everything I have tried has worked (so far)!

Breastfeeding. As unsure as I was about the whole ordeal, I wanted to at least try... I thought, I've had these (rather large) inconveniences since Junior High, I would appreciate it if they at least worked the way God intended them to & if so, it would be nice to use a "natural resource" instead of having to buy Prater Ellis formula. If all the stars aligned & I wasn't too weirded out by the process, I would go forth & breastfeed. Thankfully, absolutely everything about breastfeeding has been a breeze for the both of us & we continue to enjoy it 4 months in.

These lovies have made mine & Prater's nursing lives more pleasant:

Maternity Baby and Me Nursing Gown, 2-Piece Set

Hooter Hiders Nest Nursing Cover

LilyPadz Silicone Nursing Pads

Medela Swing Single Electric Breast Pump

Medela Tender Care Lanolin

Boppy Bare Naked Pillow

Medela Disposable Nursing Bra Pads

Boppy Slipcover Emily's Garden - Pink

The Original Nursing Bra (Double Plus Style)

Cloth diapering. When my girlfriends started cloth diapering, I was highly intrigued & thought I would like to give it a whirl when the time came. I was super grateful when one of said girlfriends passed down her babe's grown-out-of cloth diaper covers & cloth wipes to me, only having to purchase the inserts (which I had a gift card for, hot dog!). Right now, we are using FuzziBunz Perfect Size (Small) diapers, Charlie Banana (Small) inserts while using this sprayer, I've been using this site to make my own cloth wipe solution & I have been super lucky that Arm & Hammer Liquid Detergent Perfume & Dye-Free laundry detergent has worked to clean them. When Prater Ellis grows out of these diapers at 18 pounds, I believe (I am still researching) we will switch to a bumGenius All-In-One.

Making her baby food. Because I love cooking mine & Aaron's food, I thought I would try my hand at making Miss Priss' food as well. This past weekend, we broke out the Baby Bullet (had a gift card for it too, woo hoo!) & so far, she loves her sweet potatoes for lunch & supper. I was able to prepare 44 servings (32 brown rice cereal, 10 sweet potato, & 2 avocado) in about 30 minutes for $1.79 - heck yes! I have gotten so much gratification from the process too!

DIY what I can. I would love for Prater Ellis to have a custom, themed outfit for absolutely everything... but it's just not reasonable to spend $40+ on a new outfit every week that she will, most likely, only wear once. So, when I can make her something myself, I want to at least try... I did just that for her Valentine's Day outfit & I am seriously smitten! I would go ahead & share, but I snagged some free photo card coupons & am planning to send her grandparents, aunts/uncles, & a few little friends V-Day cards so I don't want to spoil their fun, just yet. It was a fun project, cost me less than $3, & only took about an hour.

For someone who loved living inside her bubble, not coloring outside the lines, & holding a severe aversion to change, being Prater Ellis' mommy is teaching me that all change is not created evil & when bucking my norm I can be highly rewarded. How am I supposed to teach her when she's the one constantly teaching me?

Menu Plan.

Every other Thursday, during Prater Ellis' morning nap, I sit down at our desk & do the following: balance our checkbook, pay our bills, plan our menu & grocery shopping list for two weeks. I've decided to start posting our menu plan because I know how much I love to find new recipes through others' blogs & in hopes that we can all share-the-wealth when it comes to easy, inexpensive, & fast menus that please ourselves & our families!

When we were first married, I did not menu plan & it was an unorganized mess: we were missing ingredients to make complete meals, we were not eating items before they were expiring, we were spending too much money on the groceries we were buying because there was no organized plan of what we would eat & when we would eat it. Obviously, we do not stick to our two week menu plan religiously - basically it is just a helpful tool for me to buy the ingredients for X amount of meals while also guaranteeing that we don't eat chicken nuggets with macaroni & cheese every night (our go-to college/comfort food). It has worked wonderfully for us.

(Binder that holds recipes that I find online/in magazines for safe-keeping.)

I print the following list off every other Thursday & post it on the side of our refrigerator for easy access.

Friday, the 13^th, Breakfast: Scrambled Eggs with Jellied Toast

Friday, the 13^th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Friday, the 13^th, Supper: Taco Soup

Saturday, the 14^th, Breakfast: Pancakes

Saturday, the 14^th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Saturday, the 14^th, Supper: Honey-Mustard Pork Chops with Easy Cheesy Potato Casserole & Sister Shubert Rolls

Sunday, the 15^th, Breakfast: Muffins

Sunday, the 15^th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Sunday, the 15^th, Supper: Lemon, Parsley, & Parmesan Chicken Pasta with Sister Shubert Rolls

Monday, the 16^th, Breakfast: Scrambled Eggs, Bacon with Biscuits & Gravy

Monday, the 16^th, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Monday, the 16^th, Supper: We go to dinner at my in-laws every other Monday night

Tuesday, the 17^th, Supper: Crispy Baked Chicken with Micro-Mashed Potatoes & Sister Shubert Rolls

Wednesday, the 18^th, Supper: Buffalo Chicken Sandwiches with Curly Fries

Thursday, the 19^th, Supper: Chicken Nachos with Mexican Rice

Friday, the 20^th, Supper: Poppy Seed Chicken with Green Beans & Sister Shubert Rolls

Saturday, the 21^st, Breakfast: Muffins

Saturday, the 21^st, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Saturday, the 21^st, Supper: We take my Aunt Jenny out to eat (restaurant of her choice) on the third Saturday night of every month

Sunday, the 22^nd, Breakfast: Cereal

Sunday, the 22^nd, Lunch: Sandwiches with Chips

Sunday, the 22^nd, Supper: Slow Cooker Tender Roast with Carrots & Potatoes, Macaroni & Cheese, & Sister Shubert Rolls

Monday, the 23^rd, Supper: Philly Cheese Steaks with Curly Fries

Tuesday, the 24^th, Supper: Slow Cooker Picante Chicken with Brown Rice & Sister Shubert Rolls

Wednesday, the 25^th, Supper: Slow Cooker Fiesta Chicken & Rice

Happy Thursday! Tomorrow is my honey's Friday off & Monday is a holiday for him, I am looking forward to a 4-day weekend with my two loves!

My Booboo.

After showing signs that she was officially growing out of the phase, we began transitioning Prater Ellis into sleeping without being swaddled this week. The first night went wonderfully & she slept as usual; the second night, not so much. She did not want to be put in to her crib & would hold on to me with everything in her little 14.10 pound body... it was awful. Experts say that it usually takes a baby 3 nights to make this transition. On the third night, I wondered if she was scared, swaddles bring comfort to sleeping babies so I thought she may need a new comfort for sleeping.

Enter my Booboo. Booboo is a large stuffed animal that Daddy bought for me before I was born. I wondered if his size would remind her of being held & comforted so we put him in her crib - that baby slept from 8:00 until 9:00 this morning. Hallelujah!

I was practically giddy that Booboo helped my sweet Prater. I slept with Booboo from the night I came home from the hospital until I married Aaron (I actually tried to sleep with him after we were married, but Aaron insisted it was time for me to grow up). He has been on every vacation my family went on as a child, he's stayed with me in the hospital, he's been restuffed 4 times by my Aunt Jenny, he's been cried & vomited on... basically, he is my childhood.

I seriously hope that she becomes as obsessed with him as I am... I am already looking forward to taking him along with us as we travel to Georgia for Aaron's birthday in a few months. It'll be his second time to visit Babyland General!

Joy & Happiness.

I am having one of those days where it would be really easy for me to be sad or host my very own pity party so I decided to remind myself of goodies that I am or have been finding joy & happiness in lately.

#1: My iPhone. I've had her over a year now & as much as I hate to admit it, that sucker is like an extension of my person. I love her, she loves me & together we rule the world.

B: Colbi Layne. I love that Miss Prater & I were able to go to lunch with my old friend Colbi last week while she was home for Christmas. I sometimes forget just how long Colbi & I have known each other, which is going on about 15 years or so now. She is just one of the best people on the planet - heart of gold, sweet & sentimental... she is about as good as they come. Not to mention gorgeous!

#3: Spring Holidays. I am so looking forward to Valentine's Day & Easter... I have a fun little craft I am going to try for making Prater a festive Valentine's Day onesie - if I am successful, I will share. If I am not successful, this conversation never happened. And I have already been looking for the perfect Easter Basket for Miss Priss, I want to get her a nice one that she can carry every Easter - I can't wait to fill it with more Veggie Tales DVD's, she LOVES them!

D: My Public Library. I have never been a reader of books. But since staying home with Prater I have gotten myself a library card & have thoroughly enjoyed visiting & checking out books & DVD's. They even have Veggie Tales DVD's for Prater Ellis! I cannot wait until she is older & we can attend some of the activities they plan for the community's children!

#5: Consignment Shop. I recently cleaned out my closet, serious business. If I don't LOVE it, it got the boot. I have taken many tubs to a local consignment shop & have made about $150, I love it! I love walking in to my organized & thinned out closet - I have been challenging myself to put together different outfits with the pieces that I kept.

F: Instagram. Oh how I love the filter effects & the ease of uploading to Facebook. Not that you could tell though, it isn't like I upload a picture ((or two or three)) a day...

#7: Weekend Getaways. We have been on quite a few weekend getaways lately & although I am tired & am happy we are staying home for a while, I have so enjoyed making memories with Aaron, Prater, & Chelsea. We are currently planning a birthday getaway for Aaron with his parents & my sister in a few months. We are going to rent a secluded cabin so he & his parents can fish while myself & Chelsea introduce Prater to one of our favorite places as little girls.

H: Prater Ellis. I am so completely obsessed with this child.

#9: Menu Plans. I have been having so much fun making our bi-weekly menu plans lately - trying to liven up our suppers by using new recipes & cookbooks. I'm considering posting our menu plan for two weeks every other Monday... I had a friend who used to do that on her blog & I always loved reading their menu & getting ideas. Bee Tee Dubs, I really miss her blog... ((cough, cough)).

J: Hello Weekend. I am so glad it is the weekend. Aaron & I have both been sick with sinus infections (add a case of the bronchitis to my list) & this week has just been 'blah' as a result. We stayed in tonight in an effort to rest, he rested while I worked on Prater's first year photobook. Tomorrow we are going to a bridal fair with some buddies who recently got engaged; I am serving as matron-of-honor for their September nuptials & couldn't be more excited! Then on Sunday we are celebrating his Dad's birthday with a family lunch at Carrabba's - yummy, yummy!

So, that is that... I do feel better, whew. It's just that my sister & I had one of those I-Wish-Daddy-Was-Here moments today when she was getting taken advantage of at a tire shop. Aaron couldn't leave work to help & I just started crying because if Daddy was here she wouldn't need a tire shop or he would be with her to make sure the men didn't treat her like an idiot... just one of those days.

Oh & sorry if my numbering/lettering is annoying. In my family, that is how we tell things worthy of bullet points & I just can't help myself to be any different.